Responsibilities – Pleasing Others or Obligation

The majority of children are indoctrinated and rewarded for pleasing others, being responsible to others needs and worrying about what other people think about what we do or think. Thus, we come into adult life believing that if everyone else is pleased, and if we focus on or worry about others, our life will be fulfilled.

As a result of this belief of obligation toward other people, you may feel more mature in your interactions. Your desire to care for others arises from your belief that you need to protect and nurture another person. While it is important to be conscientious in your interactions, you need to evaluate the duties that you need to take care of and those that are not your responsibility. At times you may have noticed that you may feel the overwhelming need to look after another person, when in fact they are perfectly able to care for themselves. It is important to gauge who really requires your help and whom you help out of a sense of obligation. As you go about your life you need to evaluate which of your responsibilities to others are necessary.

The most important person to be responsible to is to oneself, meeting ones needs first before one takes on the responsibilities of others. You may believe that taking your obligations seriously you become more responsible and mature by default. This may be the case some times. When you feel obligations to others simply to bolster your own desire to feel responsible, you may be inclined to neglect your own needs. It is important to remember that maturity comes from understanding your own needs first. By gaining insight into the true nature of your responsibilities, you will determine the obligations that are the most essential for you in the now.

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